This just in: Results of genetic test

The results are negative for two breast cancer genes, which means I have the same risk of ovarian cancer as everybody else. For some reason, an image of a too-happy mime juggling eggs (not invisible ones) is playing in my head. Next up, the PAL gene gets tested. That’s the one that links breast cancer with pancreatic cancer. If that’s positive, I can look forward to screening for pancreatic, but so what. I’ll do anything to avoid any cancer. This has gone as well as it can go so far, but it’s no stinking picnic. I’m anxious to get back to my regularly scheduled program.

THREE POSITIVES:

1- My BRAC1 and BRAC 2 genes aren’t boot cut or mutated!

2- I’m dealing with one type of cancer, not two.

3- It’s Friday, dang nab it. Now go out there and have yourself a great weekend.