Look, no hands

Arms either. If you’re dreaming of having a new rack, you might to rethink that. Getting breast reconstruction hurts like hell, and I’m one of those people with a pretty decent pain threshold. Plus, you’re not supposed to use your arms. (Don’t tell the doctor I typed this blog. I’m not supposed to do that either.) Every dish, every kid request, every everything has to be handled by Brian, so he’s not happy. I’m on narcotics for pain, so I can’t drive either. I can’t believe I’m yearning to do mundane tasks, like put my own clothes on, much less away. I know people have it way worse. I’m getting a claustrophobic feeling of wanting to escape my own body. No wonder. It’s been under attack since last November. To top it off, I couldn’t get Steven to write another blog. He said, “I don’t want to write about my mom in pain.” I was waiting for him to say, Because that’s so boring.


1- Hey, at least I have hands. Arms too. They’re pretty cool, like how they pick stuff up, drive a car and go all crazy when I get cheesed.

2- Brian dropped me off at Case Study Coffee on his way to a meeting. So I’m watching people with steady paychecks and really cute shoes go to work. One day soon, I hope to have steady pay and cute shoes. Preferably in the fall.

3- Some of my friends who are also dealing with breast cancer have been told they have between 10-20 years to live. None of the medical staff I’ve worked with has said anything like that. If they did, I’d buck that thought off in a second. Seriously, who really knows besides whatever god you believe in?

Brody Theater rocks

Empty stage at Brody. Not for long.

Open Mic Night. 9:45 pm sign up. Betsy and I get there after walking past a gaggle of drag queens over at Embers. Nothing makes me feel safer in a neighborhood than drag queens. I’m serious – if there’s one person you want defending you, it’s a drag queen. I have immense respect for anyone who can kick A in those heels.

Hands down, Brody Theater has the best open mic ever. That’s because the owner Tom is a veteran of stand-up comedy. So boy howdy does he know what it’s like. He didn’t even make us pay! And, there was an actual audience there, besides comics and musicians.

The audience appreciated Betsy Kauffman’s Jewish perspective on Christmas. They were nice to me too. They actually laughed. Another comic who impressed us was a 16-year-old guy named Alex from Vancouver. We’ve performed with him before at Curious. But this time was fantastic – he delivered some of the most original material we’ve seen. And his mother was there!! Go mom, supporting your stand-up comic kid and NOT letting him do blue material.

Now where did I leave my waist?