This just in: The cancer did not spread! They found a couple of "residual" cancer cells, but chemo killed them. It's the best possible news I could have gotten. Now the word "journey" can be used to describe big hair band, Journey, instead of cancer. "Don't stop believin,'" ya'll.
What else you got, Weird Cancer Guy?
Not that I really want to find out. But still, I'm wondering what's next. Will my fingernails pop open like trunk lids? Will I become 55% more agitated and annoyed? Or, will actual appendages just fall off? How about we start with my gut? I'm worried when I get a double mastectomy that my gut …
Out! Damn spots
For once, I'm not talking about cleaning. Today is random spot and throbbing hip joint day. I woke up and noticed new brown spots on my fingertips and palms. Plus, a side order of tingling, numb fingertips. When I walk, it's weird hip pain. What am I, 90? All that just in time for Steven …
They say it’s his birthday
My boy Steven turns 11 today! He got a special delivery of a bacon burger and shake at school (Thanks for that super-rad idea, Shonda!) In celebration, Livvie threw him a "surprise party" in her room with stuffed animals and a big sign. He actually grinned big time. …
You Caring
Today, I went out like normal people. People who shower and put on make up. That's right, I went to The Pearl District. I had a meeting about work, and I liked it. I'm starting to love work even more now. Every tagline I write makes me feel power over Weird Cancer Guy. How you …
Honeymoon’s over, Weird Cancer Guy
Sorry about going dark for two days, but Round 3 flattened me. Just barely crawling out of it after being so tired and heavy, I couldn't lift my head up, think or even talk. I need pills to not barf and pills to sleep. I feel like Elvis. Today, I dragged myself outside and took …
Making Weird Cancer Guy work for me
I'm always wondering - how can I take advantage of cancer? What about my needs? If it's going to invade my body, the least it can do is pay rent. Here are the Einstein things I came up with:1- Figure out a way to sand the stairs...with my head.2- Use chemo as an excuse. Parking …
Surviving a crafty Christmas
Friends shouldn't let friends like me craft. Karen and I decided to make a loft for our daughters' American Girl dolls because a loft from the catalog costs more than my bed. Karen did the woodwork; I did spray paint and sewing. Still zinging from my last steroid, I stayed up until 2:30 am watching …
The word of the day is: Surrender
How can one day feel like three weeks? Today did. When I woke up, my spine was throbbing. Like can't-catch-your-breath throbbing. I tried to walk and it felt like my hip bones were going to pop out and run away from me like a toddler with a cell phone. The advice nurse advised drugs, so …
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