The first person who came up to me after the word spread that I got diagnosed with cancer was J, an 11-year-old friend of my kids. He said, "I heard the news and I'm really, really sorry." Then, he gave me a hug. One night, Olivia and a group of girls put on a play …
It’s Dalai Mama
Today not as good as yesterday. But I got to go to my friend Karen's house and wrap myself up in her red blanket. Coincidentally, the Dalai Lama is coming to Portland soon. And without even trying, I've captured the look! Nothing against the Dalai Lama, but I can't wait to look like myself again. …
Mahalo in tropical SE Portland
Nothing says Aloha like moss-choked Portland...until now. In my obsession with Hawaii, my friends are making it happen! Kate brought over a mango, pineapple, papaya, plant and retro card. Then, Lisa shows up with Hawaiian dish towels and earrings. Aloha, yo! It's like being there. We're going to get there somehow. Thanks Kate and Lisa …
What else you got, Weird Cancer Guy?
Not that I really want to find out. But still, I'm wondering what's next. Will my fingernails pop open like trunk lids? Will I become 55% more agitated and annoyed? Or, will actual appendages just fall off? How about we start with my gut? I'm worried when I get a double mastectomy that my gut …
“I can’t feel anything.”
Today, we went to see the surgeon to check in on progress and talk about what kind of surgery. She was doing the exam and said she could no longer feel the tumor. WHAA? I took a turn - me either. If some dude was randomly walking down the hall, I would have gotten him …
Mistaken Identity…The Sequel
Sometimes my head erupts in a cranial hot flash, making me rip any cutie pie lid I've got on right off. I'm at a bakery, bald head glowing, when a woman with an equally stubbly bald head approaches me:"So, is your hair a lifestyle decision?" she says."No, it's a chemo decision," I say. "What about …
Mistaken hipster identity
Thank you all for your kind words after my pity party yesterday. This third round of chemo has been way harder to rebound out of - emotionally, mentally and physically. Today, I got up and MADE myself go to the gym, where I ran into Sari. After Sari and I were comparing notes on how …
Lightbulb moment
Sure, I cut my hair as a form of taking control myself instead of waiting for Weird Cancer Guy to do it for me. Plus, we have three vacuums and none of them sucks. So I didn't want to have to clean up a bunch of hair with duct tape. But still, every clump makes …
Dear Weird Cancer Guy…
Today rocked. Today was as close to normal as I have felt since my chemo A-bomb. I HAD to get out of the house, so I met my pal Maria for coffee. That felt normal. My bud Lisa came over, toting an entire dinner and snacks. Not normal. It's not like people randomly show up …
The word of the day is: Surrender
How can one day feel like three weeks? Today did. When I woke up, my spine was throbbing. Like can't-catch-your-breath throbbing. I tried to walk and it felt like my hip bones were going to pop out and run away from me like a toddler with a cell phone. The advice nurse advised drugs, so …
jacki kane 